He Finally Called

Things are so up and down. I don't understand. I just want him to pay some attention to our daughter. She needs to know that he still loves her, but he doesn't seem to "get" it. He finally called today and my darling daughter was so happy to hear his voice. He said that he doesn't like to call and her hear crying. I tried my best to explain to him that if he would call on a regular basis, even if it's only one time a week, that it would be more consistant and she would at least know that he's still around. I don't know why he can't see that. It's simple as the nose on my face. Children are innocent and they deserve to know that both parents love them, no matter what happened. Children are so precious and we, as parents, need to let them know that.

He Won't Come See His Daughter........Why?

Is it any wonder that because our daughter is out of sight, she's out of his mind too? That isn't fair. We both had this wonderful child together and he should be trying to be more a part of her life. Yes, you are probably wondering why I am so stressed out about his part of the deal, however, you wouldn't understand unless you had a daughter who sometimes broke into gigantic crocodile tears over not hearing from her own father. She is torn up over the fact that he just doesn't have time for her.....no visits, no phone calls, only when a blue moon comes around. Not only am I the one who has to hear her crying, but I have to try and make things better. I hurt for my child, because it's not her fault. She hasn't done anything to deserve this from him. Why can't he see this? Why does this man have to keep on hurting us so badly? Yes, we are apart, and we will never be back together and we have done alot to make a new life, but shouldn't he have some part in her life as well? Maybe he just has his brain on the other woman. Who knows? I think that I am just worrying too much about this, but I really hurt inside when my daughter misses her dad and he doesn't do anything about it.

Why Does My Brain Still Think I Need Him?

Oh, I think that something must be array in my brain somewhere, somehow because I just feel like there are days that I can't help but wonder about him. We had many years together and even though we went through many very bad days, we also had some good days there too. He cheated on me, so that's that. He made his decision when he made the decision to cheat. Obviously he was more into "her" than he was into "us" and our family. Things are done now, and there's nothing that I can do about it. However, since we do have a child together and she is still under 18, I have times that I feel we need to talk about her and how she is doing. Well, that's not happening these days because he just flat out doesn't answer his phone at all. I have tried calling at different times, using different phone numbers, even leaving messages to no avail. I don't understand him or what he's thinking. Does he think that just because we are apart now that he doesn't have to worry about his daughter? It kind of seems as though he has forgotten that he still has an obligation. What is he thinking? And why does my brain still think that I need him to even care?

Stressful Family Life

Not being able to trust your partner is a deal breaker for sure, and it leaves you wondering what's left of your marriage/partnership. I had an unexpected leave last week and the whole time I was gone, I only had my dad to worry about. I came home, thankful to be home but wondering what it would have been like to have to be out of state during the time I was with my ex, and having to deal with his cheating. I don't think that I could have gone through that stress on top of watching my dad go through open-heart surgery. Having a cheating husband/wife is extremely stressful, and I don't know how some deal with the added stress of illness or family matters.

Was There Any Hope Ever?

Sometimes I think back and I wonder about all of the bad things that he has put me through and I stop and wonder if there was ever any hope for us at all. I don't know if anything could have changed the past and I wonder if there was, what it would have been. Maybe if I had not tolerated some of his behaviour in the beggining, things would have ended differently. I wish that I could have spotted some of the signs of his infidelity in the beginning, but it was just so difficult for me to see. Why does life have to be so unexpected? Why couldn't he have just been content with me? I wished now that I could have been more alert about the signs when they started, but I trusted him so much and didn't ever think that he would have done this to me and to our relationship. I feel like I lost alot of time in my life with him.