What Is It That I Am Looking For ?

Someone, and a very smart someone, I might add, asked me one time "what is it that you are looking for?"  I was going through infidelity and heartache with my ex at the time. I was hurting so much and didn't really think too much about the question until one day after I got tired of crying my eyes out every day, tired of wondering if he was going to cheat again, and sick of spending every waking moment worrying about if he was with HER or not, that I began to wonder if I could actually answer that question. What was it that I wanted ?  What did I want for my future? And finally, did I WANT to be stuck in that situation forever? No, I wanted answers, but I wasn't getting any. My ex did NOT want to talk about it, nor did he want to answer my questions about it. My ex wanted me to forget about what he had done to me and our family and just "move on".  I started wondering if things would EVER change. After wasting many years of my time, the hopes and dreams of our family coming together once again just wasn't happening. My ex wanted ME to work on our marriage, but he didn't want to contribute to helping me, or us. I then began to ask myself that question...what was I looking for? And I discovered the answer.....I wanted peace...I wanted a partner who would want ME and only me. I wanted fidelity. I wanted honesty, and I wanted to not have to worry over what my future would be. It wasn't until I was able to discover for myself what I wanted, that I was able to start the process of moving on with my life, and with my future. I found that I was growing tired of the time things were taking with only me working on the marriage. It wasn't fair, and he wasn't being fair. I wanted a normal life and I wasn't getting anywhere stuck in the situation with my ex. I had to find my answers, and then I had to figure out what I was going to do to find my peace. Do you know what you want in your future? Do you know what you are looking for?

Looking Back At Infidelity

I look back at the hard times that I went through infidelity with my now ex. Times were hard. We were both working and the kids were young. Today I breathe a sigh of relief that the pain and suffering of his cheating is behind me. I will never forget what he did to me, to our family, and to my self esteem....however, I can honestly say that I walked a very long way to get to where I am today. I learned that I do not have to put up with that ever again. I am much more cautious than I used to be. I know WHO I am today and no longer suffer with low self esteem. I no longer have to hear him put me down, say ugly things to me or my friends, and I no longer need to feel unloved. Today, I love MYSELF for who I am, feel stronger for what I have been through, and thank GOD that I have family and friends who love me. Living a life through infidelity has got to be one of the hardest things to have to go through. But you DON'T have to feel as though your partner doesn't love you anymore. You need to sit down and decide if you want to start off new, which means starting all over again....hard but you CAN do it, or....you can work things out with your partner/spouse ...but this means BOTH of you working on it, not just YOU alone. Partnership if for two people..not one alone, or three. But most of all, you must take time in thinking things through before you make any decision.

Chocolate And Infidelity

Sometimes in the middle of dealing with infidelity, we MUST stop and take a little bit of time out for ourselves. There became a time when I was just so tired of dealing with the pain that I didn't think  I would ever come out of it all....but I did.
How does one come out from such hurt and heartache?  It's hard, and it certainly takes time for our heart to mend. Having someone to talk with about what your'e going through also helps tremendously.  Doing something for yourself, starting up a new hobby helps too, oh, and   chocolate !!!  Chocolate can most certainly help in your moment of grief, if just for a few moments. I don't know what it is about that sweet, savory taste, but I have had my moments.
Time, time time !  That is what it takes to get you through this pain. But most of all, remember that you don't have to make a decision overnight. Take the time to think things out.

Divorce Law

Sometimes we hang on, and in my case, I hung on way too long. Sometimes things are able to be worked out, and that's great as well. I know what it feels like to keep trying, and trying, but am the only one to be working on my marriage, and it really hurts when your other half just doesn't seem to care. One thing that I don't like, but something that we have to face, is if it doesn't work out. In that case, you must start thinking about divorce law. Not just for a divorce, but there's also times when we must think just about the legalities in separation. There are things like house, property and even the children to worry about.  There's nothing pretty about it.
When finding a lawyer, you must actually find someone who is willing to work for you. Someone sympathetic to your needs and someone who will get the job done, no matter if it's a divorce, separation, or even some other sort of family law need.
Divorce lawyer Barrie is a website that can help you sort through things, especially important things when it comes to needing a lawyer. Check out the link and see if they might be able to help you through some of your needs, whether it be just advice or an actual divorce or separation agreement.
I pray that those of you who feel like they can work out their problems of infidelity with their spouse will be able to do so, but if not, you need to have other options open.  Take care of yourself, and take your time with your decision.