After The Divorce, Do You Truely Get On With Life?

I have seen so many people who have gone through a divorce and I have not seen too many "nice" divorces though I hear that they can exist. When my husband and I divorced, I was hurt, mad, sad and didn't WANT to get over him because he hurt me so much and I wanted to make it right, but that just didn't happen....yes, we were civil and he even flirted, called and acted like he wanted me back, but I don't know if it was out of convenience for him or what, but he acted like nothing had happened. Do you really get on with life after you divorce? Well, I think that the answer is yes, because I know that I have.
All the kicking and crying I did over that man I really believed that I would never get past it all, but I have to say that I am on with a new life, and it's good. they do have their ups and downs but life is good. I think that it was good for me to take my time working through it all, because it has given me time to heal.
Healing takes time, and no one can really say how long that time will take for each of us, as we all are different in how we process everything......never give up, because time really does heal our wounds.

Has He Suddenly Remembered He Has A Daughter?

Out of the blue, I get a phone call and low and behold, it's from him. Normally when I get a call from him it's all about him......something he needs, or needing my help with one thing or another but this time he was calling about our daughter. I was totally happy that he remembered about her-finally after all this time. He had a picture of a horse that he wanted to give to her and he came over and gave it to her, along with $20. She was, of course, elated that he took time out of his "way-too-busy" schedule to remember her. He was here and gone in a flash, maybe only spending 5 minutes with her, but for him, that's better than what he HAS been giving. This man is able to come and see her, take her out WHENEVER he wants because I have allowed that, being that he is always busy, and the fact that she is now 16. It has been many months since she has seen him or even had a phone call from him. I am now wondering if he is going to finally remember he has a daughter. I hope so!

More Sex, Or Less?

I hear of some people who state that they noticed a fall in the amount of sex going on at home because their partner was with someone else. I think that once I actually found out about what was going on, EVERYTHING stopped for us at that point because I was afraid of any diseases that might be out there, plus I was totally turned OFF by him being with someone else. I will say that, before I knew what was going on, there were times that we went through that there was absolutely no intimacy and then a few times that there was more, so much so, that I was wondering why he was starting to act like a "newlywed" or someone that had just gotten with a new partner. I think that I could have gotten a clue about his infidelities at that point because he was acting like a totally different man.....but did I catch on to it at that time? No, but I guess I should have. Sometimes the clues of infidelity are there, right before your eyes, and it's really hard to see them because you can rationalize them off with answers to satisfy those questions.

10 Emotional Needs

Here is a list of 10 emotional needs........ does your partner meet them for you? Do you have any to add to this list?

1. affection
2. sexual fulfillment
3. conversation
4. recreational companionship
5. honesty and openness
6. physical attractiveness
7. financial support
8. domestic support
9. family committment
10. admiration

He Called Me To Tell Me "Happy Anniversary"

Today was just totally unexpected when he called me to tell me happy anniversary. I was shocked, stunned and speechless. I had just almost forgotten what this day was because of all the heartache he has put me through. I had loved him so much but all the pain made me want to forget. The last thing I would have thought I would hear from him was his wishing me a happy anniversary when we aren't even together anymore. He was talking to me as if we were still together, and I didn't quite understand what was going on with him. Does he not think that I am upset that he doesn't have time to come and see our daughter? Doesn't he stop and think that he should? I honestly do not know what's on his mind and I guess I never really did. I hurried up and got off the phone with him because I didn't know what was coming next, but.....oh no! oh yes, he did, he told me that he loved me before I hung up. What in the world is he saying this to me for when he is NOW with the other woman? I am really confused by his actions.

Thankyou All So Much For Your Support

Thankyou so very much. Support is something very important in today's world. I could not imagine having to go through this kind of thing without having someone to lean on. I don't know but I have found that some families are very supportive and others are just not. The actuality of this whole process is that YOU are the one that has to live with this, the decisions made and learn how to cope.....not your relatives. Of course, if you have children, you also have to worry about how they are dealing with it, but sometimes relatives can say things that can sway decisions and that's good only sometimes. I had the support of my mother and stepdad, and it was such a blessing for me, because they gave me hope that my future would go on, and honestly, it has. I no longer have my mother because she passed not quite a year ago, and my stepdad was gone before her. I haven't forgotten how much she supported me. Do you have a support system to help you with what you are going through? I hope so. I hope that if you don't, that you know that there are many of us out there who seem to be going through the same thing and it hurts like nothing else in this world, but you will, one day, get up and move on as I am trying to do. If you do not have any support, there are blogs like mine, and there are support groups online as well. Once again, I really do thank all of you who follow me and who offer words of great help.