The Big "I'm Sorry!"

I don't know where to begin as far as forgiveness. I had heard it time after time those all famous and familiar words "I'm sorry". Why do those words seem to be so easy coming out of his mouth, especially when he knows I am tired of hearing it. If he were truly sorry, then he wouldn't have kept cheating on me over and over again. After the first time and the first "I'm sorry" he should have been sorry enough to try and straighten out this mess he helped to put us in. Where do you start forgiving? How can you just pick up the big mess that he's piled in front of you and just act like things are ok? What can I do to even start the process of forgiving when I 'm hurting so badly?

Can I Forgive Him?

Can I forgive my partner when he/she cheats on me? I have heard others in the past say that if that happened to them, they would never forgive their partner, only to find later, it happened and they forgave them after all. I believe that when something so hurtful happens in your relationship, you are the only one able to make this final decision. How do you know? I know, because I have lived through this and know that no other person can make this decision for you. Sometimes we stay for our children. This works sometimes and other times not. It all depends on the circumstances of what happened and if your partner is willing to work things out. Are they remorseful enough to help you both together to work this out? Counseling, if needed? The two of you together must decide if you want things to work out. You also need time to heal. A marriage can still succeed if both can work things out successfully, but getting back the trust takes time.

Time marches on with deciet

Soon after moving back in, I tried calling him one night. I didn't get an answer, so I asked his buddy, who he was staying with and he told me that he didn't know. Turns out later, he did. So, after I moved back, we talked things through and he moved back in with me. It was AFTER he moved back in that I discovered his past. He went about his same jobs and I was trying to adjust to living in a very small room and not being able to have my own home. He wanted me to look for a house for us, so I did. And I found one. Meanwhile, my things stayed in the storage unit while I found a few more jobs and got back on my feet. One day, he started acting strange again. I was thinking that maybe it was HER again. So, one night, while he was asleep, I decided to check his cell phone because she was real famous for calling him. I heard a woman's voice on it telling him that she didn't want him to forget about her and that she loved him. WHAT???? What is happening now? IS this still going on? I got her number off the caller id and called her the next day and questioned her about it. She proceeded to tell me how they were "just friends" and she helped him get over his devistation over my leaving him. She told me that HE wasn't her type and she had a man already. So, I let it go.