When you go snooping for something........

I wanted to protect "our family" so much that I got desperate. I started checking the cell phone when he would go to take his shower, which was often because sometimes he would come in from a job and shower, so it was happening like 3 times a day. I would write down calls coming in and then I would look at the calls made out. He rarely made any calls out. Now, I got into such a habit of this, I was good at it, but it became such a ritual for me that it was almost like something I did in my normal routine of things during the day. I really shouldn't have done this. I hated doing this. All it did was take up MY time. Did I find anything? I found lots of numbers, and I found numbers once again from her work location. I went looking for something and I found it. Oh, I wished that I hadn't have. I was mad at myself for snooping for one, and mad once again that she was calling him again. But why? Couldn't she just leave us in peace?