When you go snooping for something........

I wanted to protect "our family" so much that I got desperate. I started checking the cell phone when he would go to take his shower, which was often because sometimes he would come in from a job and shower, so it was happening like 3 times a day. I would write down calls coming in and then I would look at the calls made out. He rarely made any calls out. Now, I got into such a habit of this, I was good at it, but it became such a ritual for me that it was almost like something I did in my normal routine of things during the day. I really shouldn't have done this. I hated doing this. All it did was take up MY time. Did I find anything? I found lots of numbers, and I found numbers once again from her work location. I went looking for something and I found it. Oh, I wished that I hadn't have. I was mad at myself for snooping for one, and mad once again that she was calling him again. But why? Couldn't she just leave us in peace?

My man was the snitch

What happened to all the exact hour phone calls? They stopped immediately. Wow, what a relief. But I didn't really get the relief that I wanted. Private calls started in again. And another letter through the mail. Mom was right about one thing.....he MUST have been contributing something toward her or she wouldn't be calling so much. It turned out that HE was my snitch. He was reporting back to her that I was on his back about the calls and THAT'S why she stopped. She must have been afraid that I would call her job. Actually, I did try that but since she worked at a factory, I only got workers and they acted like they didn't know what I was talking about. My own partner was the one who was stopping the calls, but not because he told her to quit, it was because he told her that I was becoming more and more suspicious. What a crock....I felt so angry. He would never ever admit that anything was going on. He still denied phone calls even though they were right there in my face. What's new?

The Other Woman Gets Braver

Here I was, trying to make things work, the calls were still coming in, only they weren't always marked private. I had a chance to answer his phone sometimes, especially since I handled his business and there I was--getting hung up on. So, I called the number back. It was her work !!! oh my, she was getting brave enough to call him...she wasn't only calling from her work, but she was calling on a set pattern. I recon she was calling him EVERY morning, during every break (2) and every lunch hour and when she got home. I was getting to know more about "her", even though she supposedly didn't exist. I knew her name, turns out, that many years ago, when our daughter was around 3 or 4 years old, he met her through a job. They became "friends". I thought that maybe she was the one who kept harrassing him because he swore up and down that HE never called anyone....that they always have to call him because he didn't like making phone calls. Now, I know, this sounds funny coming from a man who has his own self-employment business. I called my mom and cried so much, she must have thought I was a crying machine. My mother was always there to listen, but she also gave me some advice along the way. One piece of advice she told me was "If he wasn't seeing her, or calling her, then why is SHE calling so much?"